The Wolverine (2013)

Me and my dad rented Wolverine and though I’m not keen on the ol’ ninjas, samurais and Japanese things in general (yawn) I thought it was a great comic book movie!! And I enjoyed it way more than the previous Wolverine film! Well done Hugh Jackman!

Robin Hood Prince of Thieves (1991)

I used to love this film, well, bits of it. And those bits I found I do still love! But my god, what a boring overly long film it is! Still better than Russell Crowe but nowhere near as good as the Disney version.
Christ! All these Americans! Ending with a wink to the camera?! Jesus! Self-righteous American tosh! And then, every twenty minutes or so you get this really quite different, darkly comic British pantomime, Alan Rickman arrives and you wake up and you find you're enjoying the film all of a sudden! He's camp but he's scary, he's funny but fucking weird! That bit when he talks to that kid "I had a very troubled childhood, I'll tell you about it sometime..." then he stops an seems to remember he's in the middle of being a professional sheriff, he's not, he's a fucking nutbar! And he plays it so well. You can bet your bottom dollar that it's because of his performance in this dreadful film that got him every other job he's ever had.
Sometimes I think it's a shame he got that Harry Potter job. Yes I'm in the minority that think he's completely miscast, but I really do think that comedy is where his talent really lies, that in Robin Hood and Galaxy Quest he is simply brilliant, and perhaps if he hadn't done Harry Potter he might have had better roles and made some better films! Who knows.
Tim Roth would have been a great Snape. He turned it down apparently. Imagine! Imagine if Tim Roth was Snape! Lily, James, Lupin and Sirius would have been better cast as well, they would have cast them around Roth! Cast them the right age! Had them all in their forties rather than their sixties! Ridiculous.

Looper (2012)

 How the flip did they do it? How did they make Tommy from 3rd Rock from the Sun look like a young Bruce Willis?! False nose, false eyes, big drawn on eyebrows (despite the fact Bruce has no eyebrows) and- now this is the important bit- Tommy doing an impression; that wry sideways smile Bruce always does and the short derrisive laugh. It was an ok film, I only went because I wanted to see someone doing an impression of Bruce, I like seeing actors doing impressions! There was a bit that was a bit too much for me and Celia, too graphic and horrible, yuck, you know the bit.

The Dark Knight Rises (2012)

 Saw it with Dad-Y after a lunch at Jamie Oliver's York restaurant. Both of us went in saying "Well, I just don't see how it can be better than the last one." We both came out saying "It was a million times better than the last one!!" We only saw it once and we haven't analysed the crap out of it, I enjoyed it SO much I can't wait to get it for Christmas and watch it a second time- might fast forward all Michael Caine's overacting though.

The Amazing Spider-man (2012)

 Me, Anna, Mikey and Roger all went out to the big cinema to see Spidey, we had pizzas and crap at Frankie and Benny's first and Roger's student ID got us FIFTEEN pounds off the final bill! Now that was amazing. I don't know, it was ok, Anna really enjoyed it (and she hates comics!) She was really upset when Uncle Ben died, and it was great because she'd forgotten he does die, I suppose that's the advantage of not being a nerd, that film actually surprised her!

The Avengers (2012)

Me and Mikey saw it the day after it came out, for comic shop duty of course... and Lauren and Steve went another time, for comic shop duty of course! It were great! I'd like to see it again, but this time Iron-man should die. That's right, I said it! I find him irritating, cocky and wankery beyond belief, I wanted Loki to kill him.

Sherlock Holmes 2 (2012)

SHITE.
I liked one scene, the scene three minutes before the end when Moriaty and Holmes chuck themselves over the Reichenbach Falls. And then what? They bring Holmes back instantly!? Didn't the original fans of the books have to wait ten years or something before he was brought back to life? I think that was a bit more dramatic.

Captain America (2011)

I was really looking forward to Captain America. And the first hour really delivered, it was a great origin story and then the bit with the USO show was so much fun, what a great song!
After that though, when he actually started being Captain America it was so boring and you don't really learn anything about the characters, no pasts, no motivation, what was the Red Skull actually after? What was it actually about? Why did JJ Feild have no closeups?
I was very annoyed that the girl character was so typically what they're always like in those Marvel films, she said at one point that she had struggled in life too, but that was as much character development you got!! She was just there to really really like Captain America.
I liked all the British character actors (Toby Jones, Richard Armitage, Dakin, Filch, etc.) and the end credits were very nicely done.

The Eagle (2011)

Saw this film more than a month ago with Pennifer. I remember being pleasantly surprised! We only went to see it 'cause there was nothing else on, but it was a good yarn and only the last four seconds ruined it...
"Right buddy?" -wink to camera!
*Shudder*
Also, what a waste of Mark Strong, hiding him under wigs and beards.

Inception (2010)

Best film I've seen for AGES!

Looked amazing, brilliant intelligent script, wonderful ensemble! No shortage of eye-candy either, god I love Tom Hardy.

I want to OWN it!

Extreme Ops (2002)

Listen to this, this is the summary from the Radio Times and the reason why I set the video and taped this film:

"Mediocre action film starring Rupert Graves and Rufus Sewell. A group of snowboarders persue a war criminal."

And it did it's job; it passed an hour and a half with my father who is not happy unless he is in front of a screen (or at Lidl). It was as expected bloody awful. But sort of rewardingly bad, you know, we enjoyed the appallingly bad dialogue and bad acting, the overacting to compensate for the miscasting of Gravesy as an obnoxious American... and in general this very poor attempt at finding a suitable leading role for Rufus Sewell.
Ah, Roofy, you had such promise... But somebody blew it, you never got to be Heathcliff, and Heathcliff you were born to play. Yes, he is at his charming best when in period dramas, somehow his smouldering charm does not come across in modern settings, probably because he looks like an old painting, I know how you feels Roofy, I am in that same boat, we should probably just get married... I hate seeing him cast as bad guys, creeps and obnoxious wankers, that's what Hollywood thinks of him! What do they know?!
Anyway, in the end I was quite getting into it despite it being about something I have no interest in and it being so badly written (the last scene showed Rufus Sewell looking out of the window at his extreme-sports friends doing a wacky stunt on a train that happened to be passing his office at that exact moment, Roofy rolled his eyes and muttered: "Here we go again!") But then it just ended and all the bad guys suddenly died! It needed someone to come in and write a proper ending! Then I would have given it a nice average two stars instead of one. Pah!

The Bounty Hunter (2010)

The options were a French film, the Leo film or this. Anna and I had just spent a week in Italy seeing amazing architecture and works of art and ice cream, we had saturday to kill and we were tired, so instead of seeing a film we actually fancied seeing we settled on this obvious drivel.

And what drivel!

You know a film is badly written when at the end the main characters explain the last two hours to the audience through typical Harry Potter conversations: "So you see, it wasn't Snape after all! It was Voldemort all along!" Yeah, that happened at the end of this film, but in much more detail, as if the audinece actually cared what the FUCK was happening by then! Total rubbish.

Anyway, Anna and I both came out of the cinema talking about the same thing, how gorgeous Jennifer Aniston is. There was a time towards the end of Friends when she was so horrifically thin that she made us feel sick, well those days are over, she is 41 and she is lovely, her legs, her arms and her face are perfect.

Sunshine (2007)

Event Horizon crossed with The English Patient.

Except the English patient is played by Mark Strong and, boy, is he miffed about something!

Angels and Demons (2009)

Yeah the Da Vinci Code(2006) was shite, but so was the book!! We all read it! We all enjoyed it as we were reading but felt like we'd wasted a night at the end of it!

I read Angels and Demons three years ago while on holiday... in Rome. It was one of the books in the house. I enjoyed it! Yes, probably because I was in Rome and visiting all the sights of the horrific murders and that made it more exciting. But I don't know, I actually enjoyed it!

In the book really liked the Camerlengo, I thought he was great! I pictured a 36 year old Jonathan Pryce so I was really pleased with the idea of Ewan McGregor in the film, 'cause, you know, he's a good British actor (important).

He was both cute and sinister, really the cute and extremely heroic outweighed the sinister a bit too much for my liking (though I suppose it's not supposed to be obvious that he's the bad guy- even though you could tell in the book straight away- why else would I picture a sinister Mr Dark -esq Pryce?!) Yeah! I wanted him to be Pope too!! And I don't even care about religion! That guy just saved the Vatican!! Make him the new Pope!!!

I remembered it all very clearly from the book which I found odd because I don't remember all of the books I've read and I sort of figured Dan Brown as pulp fiction would be easily forgettable but I came out saying "So when were we going to find out that he was the Pope's son?" I have a feeling that it was probably shot but edited out of the bit where Tom Hanks finds the end-the-film-quickly-plot-device recording of Skarsgard arguing with Ewan, the way he shouted "Your Father!" sort of implied that in those diaries he'd read the truth. The truth that would have given McGregor motive for madness and sort of explain his behavior a bit... Ah well!

Anyway, even though it was still rubbish and Tom Hanks is still badly cast I liked it, but that's because I found the Camerlengo extremely endearing (to put it politely) both in the book and the film. More in the book though, you know, when he was Italian not Irish.