Anna bought some horrific badges that said stuff like "'citing!" and "ball bags" on them, I didn't want any.
Trevor Lock was Russell's warm up guy, and I thought he was ok, me and Anna were laughing at your routine. You could sort of tell that the audience just wanted to know where the hell Russell was and that none of them had heard of Trevor, they obviously hadn't listened to the radio for the past ten months like me and Anna where Trev is one of Russell's co-hosts. (along with Matt! Woo! Where Matt where Matt where Matt?) We loved Trevor's final joke and him stripping down to bikini, he was brilliant. The theatre was so hot that I can't remember much of what he said or Russell and people keep asking me what it was like but my eyes dried up somehow and maybe my brain too...
Russell did two hours and kept explaining in the first hour "This isn't the show, i'll start that in a minute," my favourite parts of the show were the bits that weren't the show. His first hour consisted of going through the local newspapers and reading out all the most boring stories and taking the piss out of them. He also took the piss out of the girls from Emmerdale who had come to see him- oh, and he walked among the audience and sat on people, not us, we were in the circle. Anyway, the newspapers, it was very amusing, the first story he chose to ridiclue was about a woman who was trying to promote hula-hooping as a big new exercise alternative. He called her on Craig's phone- Craig was in the front row, Russell used his phone to make various prank calls. He left a message on the hula hooping woman's phone and then later a message on some grouting company's phone- they called back which was most amusing, I'd love to get one of those phonecalls with an audience laughing in the background, it was hilarious. Russells' second hour was basically him talking about sex, which was most amusing but a bit crass. What I do remember however is:
"Me, I'd look out of place on a bike, 'less it was a penny farthing... How do you do madam? Oh, Mr Merrick! Good evening John, how are you? -Oh, that's ever so kind of you to ask *slurp*- Very grateful the Elephant Man wasn't he? Nah, he's alright, I liked 'im." Then Russell told himself "It's an obscure reference as it is, just stop it." Me and Anna were cheering for more Elephant Man impressions.
At the end of Russell's show he said "Now, those of you who are thinking, 'oh, he's on the telly, he's unobtainable..' I'm not. Ok? I'm not! So I'll be in the foyer in a minute for a cuddle, see ya!"
We couldn't get out of that bloody place for all the freaks and weirdoes hanging about wanting to meet and shag Russell. In an other life we would have liked to meet him too, but we knew that Dad-Y and Mooma were waiting outside and probably had been for about half an hour, so we left and didn't meet old Rus.
Russell was great though, it sounds boring 'cause I'm a bit tired, but some of the news paper stuff he did and the improvised stuff was all brilliant, it was just like the radio show though I did miss Matt.
2011 Author's Note: This was the first of three times Anna and I went to see Russell's stand up, I think it's best to think of him as having died rather than think about what he's up to now. I loved that radio show (see photo- remember when Matt ate all those narners?)